Beach.

The hardest thing me for to describe is what I'm thinking about. How would I put my thoughts into words? How do I describe what I'm going through? How would I say how I'm feeling? It's so hard for me to find the perfect words to explain. If someone were to ask me what I'm thinking about right now, I wouldn't be able to answer it. And I'm not saying this because I want to seem mysterious or anything.

There is a lot going on. But it's nothing in particular; it's everything in general. School, one-sided frienships, friend's hurt, my hurt, my brokenness, my parents, my siblings, my classmates, the pressure of college, pressure to be perfect, my "to do" list, keeping up with my relationship with Jesus, feeling confident with myself, being myself, being real, etc. The list could go on forever.

So, not confronting any of these problems recently, I took some time today and drove to the beach. This is probably where I let things go most. It's somewhere away from the busy life. I can go there and be alone with Jesus. I can relax. Even if I dont go outside my car because I'm scared of being kidnapped! :)

I went there about an hour ago and just talked to Jesus. I turned off my phone and turned up my worship music. I let God know what was going on in my life and let him speak to me through the music. What did he tell me, you might ask? He is consistant.

And it means the world to me that He is. I am not constant. I'm constantly.. everywhere doing something else every hour. I'm busy. There, I admited it. And I'm fixing it. I'm going to cut back on how much I do every week. But that's a different story! So God reminded me that he has never changed. Ever. And He has been here a loottt longer than I. It's refreshing to know that whether I am freaking out, excited, scared, bored, angry, etc.. He is always the same. He isn't based on emotions like I am. He doesn't change his thoughts based on a situation or an emotion like I do. He is perfect. He is love. He is my best friend.

The song "Love Never Fails" by Brandon Heath came on the radio and it just spoke to me. I've heard it before but this time it was different. I am still listening to it right now. It's just an excellent reminder of who God is: he is love. And love never fails us.